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I hate buying really expensive things. 

I think the reason I hate it so much is because I always feel unprepared and uneducated about what I want to purchase. When I don't know a lot about a certain thing, I either spend way too much time investigating on my own, or I reach out to someone who has more knowledge than me about the item. 

Unfortunately, most of the time the most educated person about a big ticket item happens to be that dreaded sales person.


(that chest hair)

See, I have this natural instinct to believe that everyone at their core is a "good person". But it has always been the sales person that has brought me close to abandoning that belief. They attempt to come off as your best friend, as the source of unbiased knowledge, as a security blanket in the land of dangerous purchases. When really, most of them are out to manipulate you or pressure you into purchasing from them so they get a huge commission. I'm not saying ALL sales people are like this, in fact my brother from another mother is actually a model sales guy, but most are cow poopies.

Especially... the car salesman

Isabella and I are hunting to buy a new car. Something that will be big enough to grow with our family, big enough to haul stuff, but small enough to not be the douche in the H2. You know who I'm talking about...

(yeah yeah, it's an H3, I know...)

The first one that caught our eye was the Ford Edge. We're already happy Ford owners from the Focus purchase last year and thought we'd keep it in the family. We're slowly finding out that the Seattle area Ford sales people are not much like the friendly Waukesha sales people we encountered. 

Sales guy number one would not shut up about they are the "lowest price in the area" and told me there was no need to look around. How everyone else would look at other dealerships but would always come back to them. Then he proceeded to talk crap about a different specific dealer. How they were shady and tried to be sneaky about pricing. After all this talk about giving us the best deal in the area... all he offered us was what they posted on their web site. Look... either tell me straight that the internet price is all I'm going to get, or shut your yap about you "not caring about car prices".

So we went to "the bad dealer" because I had to see for myself. Guess what... they weren't that bad. In fact, the way they handled their customers was about the same only they didn't talk so much crap. They almost got us to purchase a car, until the big boss man pooped on the deal the sales guy was going to give us (we had a Chicago bonding moment)... so we walked out. 

The moral of the story is...


What I've learned is that the sales people play a very specific game and that there is a very specific counter-game you can play to throw them off guard. Car sales people HATE when you are confident, in control, but completely indifferent. Show enough interest to get them begging, but keep enough distance to want to chase you. Get up and walk towards the door a couple times and watch them squirm. Tell them when and what to write down or what paper work to stop or start filling out. Stop them dead in their tracks during their pressure tactics and call them out on it. I think this will become a new hobby for me. 

At least it would if I didn't feel like punching each one in their nose... that might get me in a bit of trouble.